Chapter 4 Visions

I went back to school. This was the right thing to do, the most inconspicuous way tobehave.

　　By the end of the day, almost all the other students had returned to class, too. JustTyler and Bella and a few others—who were probably using the accident as a chance toditch—remained absent.

　　It shouldn’t be so hard for me to do the right thing. But, all afternoon, I wasgritting my teeth against the urge that had me yearning ditch, too—in order to go find thegirl again.

　　Like a stalker. An obsessessed stalker. An obsessessed, vampire stalker.

　　School today was—somehow, impossibly—even more boring than it had seemedjust a week ago. Coma-like. It was as if the color had drained from the bricks, the trees,the sky, the faces around me… I stared at the cracks in the walls.

　　There was another right thing I should be doing…that I was not. Of course, it wasalso a wrong thing. It all depended on the perspective from which you viewed it.

　　From the perspective of a Cullen—not just a vampire, but a Cullen, someone whobelonged to a family, such a rare state in our world—the right thing to do would havegone something like this:

　　“I’m surprised to see you in class, Edward. I heard you were involved in thatawful accident this morning.”

　　“Yes, I was, Mr. Banner, but I was the lucky one.” A friendly smile. “I didn’t gethurt at all… I wish I could say the same for Tyler and Bella.”

　　“How are they?”

　　“I think Tyler is fine…just some superficial scrapes from the windshield glass.

　　I’m not sure about Bella, though.” A worried frown. “She might have a concussion. Iheard she was pretty incoherent for a while—seeing things even. I know the doctors wereworried…”

　　That’s how it should have gone. That’s what I owed my family.

　　 “I’m surprised to see you in class, Edward. I heard you were involved in thatawful accident this morning.”

　　“I wasn’t hurt.” No smile.

　　Mr. Banner shifted his weight from foot to foot, uncomfortable.

　　“Do you have any idea how Tyler Crowley and Bella Swan are? I heard therewere some injuries…”

　　I shrugged. “I wouldn’t know.”

　　Mr. Banner cleared his throat. “Er, right…” he said, my cold stare making hisvoice sound a bit strained.

　　He walked quickly back to the front of classroom and began his lecture.

　　It was the wrong thing to do. Unless you looked at it from a more obscure pointof view.

　　It just seemed so…so unchivalrous to slander the girl behind her back, especiallywhen she was proving more trustworthy than I could have dreamed. She hadn’t saidanything to betray me, despite having good reason to do so. Would I betray her when shehad done nothing but keep my secret?

　　I had a nearly identical conversation with Mrs. Goff—just in Spanish rather thanin English—and Emmett gave me a long look.

　　I hope you have a good explanation for what happened today. Rose is on thewarpath.

　　I rolled my eyes without looking at him.

　　I actually had come up with a perfectly sound explanation. Just suppose I hadn’tdone anything to stop the van from crushing the girl… I recoiled from that thought. Butif she had been hit, if she’d been mangled and bleeding, the red fluid spilling, wasting onthe blacktop, the scent of the fresh blood pulsing through the air …I shuddered again, but not just in horror. Part of me shivered in desire. No, Iwould not have been able to watch her bleed without exposing us all in a much moreflagrant and shocking way.

　　It was a perfectly sound excuse…but I wouldn’t use it. It was too shameful.

　　And I hadn’t thought of it until long after the fact, regardless.

　　 Look out for Jasper, Emmett went on, oblivious to my reverie. He’s not asangry…but he’s more resolved.

　　I saw what he meant, and for a moment the room swam around me. My rage wasso all-consuming that a red haze clouded my vision. I thought I would choke on it.

　　SHEESH, EDWARD! GET A GRIP! Emmett shouted at me in his head. Hishand came down on my shoulder, holding me in my seat before I could jump to my feet.

　　He rarely used his full strength—there was rarely a need, for he was so much strongerthan any vampire any of us had ever encountered—but he used it now. He gripped myarm, rather than pushing me down. If he’d been pushing, the chair under me would havecollapsed.

　　EASY! He ordered.

　　I tried to calm myself, but it was hard. The rage burned in my head.

　　Jasper’s not going to do anything until we all talk. I just thought you shouldknow the direction he’s headed.

　　I concentrated on relaxing, and I felt Emmett’s hand loosen.

　　Try not to make more of a spectacle of yourself. You’re in enough trouble as it is.

　　I took a deep breath and Emmett released me.

　　I searched around the room routinely, but our confrontation had been so short andsilent that only a few people sitting behind Emmett had even noticed. None of themknew what to make of it, and they shrugged it off. The Cullens were freaks—everyoneknew that already.

　　Damn, kid, you’re a mess, Emmett added, sympathy in his tone.

　　“Bite me,” I muttered under my breath, and I heard his low chuckle.

　　Emmett didn’t hold grudges, and I probably ought to be more grateful for his easygoing nature. But I could see that Jasper’s intentions made sense to Emmett, that he wasconsidering how it might be the best course of action.

　　The rage simmered, barely under control. Yes, Emmett was stronger than I was,but he’d yet to beat me in a wrestling match. He claimed that this was because I cheated,but hearing thoughts was just as much a part of who I was as his immense strength was apart of him. We were evenly matched in a fight.

　　 A fight? Was that where this was headed? Was I going to fight with my familyover a human I barely knew?

　　I thought about that for a moment, thought about the fragile feel of the girl’s bodyin my arms in juxtaposition with Jasper, Rose, and Emmett—supernaturally strong andfast, killing machines by nature…Yes, I would fight for her. Against my family. I shuddered.

　　But it wasn’t fair to leave her undefended when I was the one who’d put her indanger.

　　I couldn’t win alone, though, not against the three of them, and I wondered whomy allies would be.

　　Carlisle, certainly. He would not fight anyone, but he would be wholly againstRose’s and Jasper’s designs. That might be all I needed. I would see…Esme, doubtful. She would not side against me either, and she would hate todisagree with Carlisle, but she would be for any plan that kept her family intact. Her firstpriority would not be rightness, but me. If Carlisle was the soul of our family, then Esmewas the heart. He gave us a leader who deserved following; she made that following intoan act of love. We all loved each other—even under the fury I felt toward Jasper andRose right now, even planning to fight them to save the girl, I knew that I loved them.

　　Alice…I had no idea. It would probably depend on what she saw coming. Shewould side with the winner, I imagined.

　　So, I would have to do this without help. I wasn’t a match for them alone, but Iwasn’t going to let the girl be hurt because of me. That might mean evasive action…My rage dulled a bit with the sudden, black humor. I could imagine how the girlwould react to my kidnapping her. Of course, I rarely guessed her reactions right—butwhat other reaction could she have besides terror?

　　I wasn’t sure how to manage that, though—kidnapping her. I wouldn’t be able tostand being close to her for very long. Perhaps I would just deliver her back to hermother. Even that much would be fraught with danger. For her.

　　And also for me, I realized suddenly. If I were to kill her by accident… I wasn’tcertain exactly how much pain that would cause me, but I knew it would be multifacetedand intense.

　　 The time passed quickly while I mulled over all the complications ahead of me:

　　the argument waiting for me at home, the conflict with my family, the lengths I might beforced to go to afterward…Well, I couldn’t complain that life outside this school was monotonous any more.

　　The girl had changed that much.

　　Emmett and I walked silently to the car when the bell rang. He was worryingabout me, and worrying about Rosalie. He knew whose side he would have to choose ina quarrel, and it bothered him.

　　The others were waiting for us in the car, also silent. We were a very quiet group.

　　Only I could hear the shouting.

　　Idiot! Lunatic! Moron! Jackass! Selfish, irresponsible fool! Rosalie kept up aconstant stream of insults at the top of her mental lungs. It made it hard to hear theothers, but I ignored her as best I could.

　　Emmett was right about Jasper. He was sure of his course.

　　Alice was troubled, worrying about Jasper, flipping through images of the future.

　　No matter which direction Jasper came at the girl, Alice always saw me there, blockinghim. Interesting…neither Rosalie nor Emmett was with him in these visions. So Jasperplanned to work alone. That would even things up.

　　Jasper was the best, certainly the most experienced fighter among us. My oneadvantage lay in that I could hear his moves before he made them.

　　I had never fought more than playfully with Emmett or Jasper—just horsingaround. I felt sick at the thought of really trying to hurt Jasper…No, not that. Just to block him. That was all.

　　I concentrated on Alice, memorizing Jasper’s different avenues of attack.

　　As I did that, her visions shifted, moving further and further away from theSwan’s house. I was cutting him off earlier…Stop that, Edward! It can’t happen this way. I won’t let it.

　　I didn’t answer her, I just kept watching.

　　She began searching farther ahead, into the misty, unsure realm of distantpossibilities. Everything was shadowy and vague.

　　 The entire way home, the charged silence did not lift. I parked in the big garageoff the house; Carlisle’s Mercedes was there, next to Emmett’s big jeep, Rose’s M3 andmy Vanquish. I was glad Carlisle was already home—this silence would endexplosively, and I wanted him there when that happened.

　　We went straight to the dining room.

　　The room was, of course, never used for its intended purpose. But it wasfurnished with a long oval mahogany table surrounded by chairs—we were scrupulousabout having all the correct props in place. Carlisle liked to use it as a conference room.

　　In a group with such strong and disparate personalities, sometimes it was necessary todiscuss things in a calm, seated manner.

　　I had a feeling that the setting was not going to help much today.

　　Carlisle sat in his usual seat at the eastern head of the room. Esme was besidehim—they held hands on top of the table.

　　Esme’s eyes were on me, their golden depths full of concern.

　　Stay. It was her only thought.

　　I wished I could smile at the woman who was truly a mother to me, but I had noreassurances for her now.

　　I sat on Carlisle’s other side. Esme reached around him to put her free hand onmy shoulder. She had no idea of what was about to start; she was just worrying aboutme.

　　Carlisle had a better sense of what was coming. His lips were pressed tightlytogether and his forehead was creased. The expression looked too old for his young face.

　　As everyone else sat, I could see the lines being drawn.

　　Rosalie sat directly across from Carlisle, on the other end of the long table. Sheglared at me, never looking away.

　　Emmett sat beside her, his face and thoughts both wry.

　　Jasper hesitated, and then went to stand against the wall behind Rosalie. He wasdecided, regardless of the outcome of this discussion. My teeth locked together.

　　Alice was the last to come in, and her eyes were focused on something far away—the future, still too indistinct for her to make use of it. Without seeming to think about it, she sat next to Esme. She rubbed her forehead as if she had a headache. Jasper twitcheduneasily and considered joining her, but he kept his place.

　　I took a deep breath. I had started this—I should speak first.

　　“I’m sorry,” I said, looking first at Rose, then Jasper and then Emmett. “I didn’tmean to put any of you at risk. It was thoughtless, and I take full responsibility for myhasty action.”

　　Rosalie glared at me balefully. “What do you mean, ‘take full responsibility’?

　　Are you going to fix it?”

　　“Not the way you mean,” I said, working to keep my voice even and quiet. “I’mwilling to leave now, if that makes things better.” If I believe that the girl will be safe, if Ibelieve that none of you will touch her, I amended in my head.

　　“No,” Esme murmured. “No, Edward.”

　　I patted her hand. “It’s just a few years.”

　　“Esme’s right, though,” Emmett said. “You can’t go anywhere now. That wouldbe the opposite of helpful. We have to know what people are thinking, now more thanever.”

　　“Alice will catch anything major,” I disagreed.

　　Carlisle shook his head. “I think Emmett is right, Edward. The girl will be morelikely to talk if you disappear. It’s all of us leave, or none of us.”

　　“She won’t say anything,” I insisted quickly. Rose was building up to theexplosion, and I wanted this fact out there first.

　　“You don’t know her mind,” Carlisle reminded me.

　　“I know this much. Alice, back me up.”

　　Alice stared up at me wearily. “I can’t see what will happen if we just ignorethis.” She glanced at Rose and Jasper.

　　No, she couldn’t see that future—not when Rosalie and Jasper were so decidedagainst ignoring the incident.

　　Rosalie’s palm smacked down on the table with a loud bang. “We can’t allow thehuman a chance to say anything. Carlisle, you must see that. Even if we decided to alldisappear, it’s not safe to leave stories behind us. We live so differently from the rest of our kind—you know there are those who would love an excuse to point fingers. We haveto be more careful than anyone else!”

　　“We’ve left rumors behind us before,” I reminded her.

　　“Just rumors and suspicions, Edward. Not eyewitnesses and evidence!”

　　“Evidence!” I scoffed.

　　But Jasper was nodding, his eyes hard.

　　“Rose—” Carlisle began.

　　“Let me finish, Carlisle. It doesn’t have to be any big production. The girl hit herhead today. So maybe that injury turns out to be more serious that it looked.” Rosalieshrugged. “Every mortal goes to sleep with the chance of never waking up. The otherswould expect us to clean up after ourselves. Technically, that would make it Edward’sjob, but this is obviously beyond him. You know I’m capable of control. I would leaveno evidence behind me.”

　　“Yes, Rosalie, we all know how proficient an assassin you are,” I snarled.

　　She hissed at me, furious.

　　“Edward, please,” Carlisle said. Then he turned to Rosalie. “Rosalie, I lookedthe other way in Rochester because I felt that you were owed your justice. The men youkilled had wronged you monstrously. This is not the same situation. The Swan girl is aninnocent.”

　　“It’s not personal, Carlisle,” Rosalie said through her teeth. “It’s to protect usall.”

　　There was a brief moment of silence while Carlisle thought through his answer.

　　When he nodded, Rosalie’s eyes lit up. She should have known better. Even if I hadn’tbeen able to read his thoughts, I could have anticipated his next words. Carlisle nevercompromised.

　　“I know you mean well, Rosalie, but…I’d like very much for our family to beworth protecting. The occasional…accident or lapse in control is a regrettable part ofwho we are.” It was very like him to include himself in the plural, though he had neverhad such a lapse himself. “To murder a blameless child in cold blood is another thingentirely. I believe the risk she presents, whether she speaks her suspicions or not, is nothing to the greater risk. If we make exceptions to protect ourselves, we risksomething much more important. We risk losing the essence of who we are.”

　　I controlled my expression very carefully. It wouldn’t do at all to grin. Or toapplaud, as I wished I could.

　　Rosalie scowled. “It’s just being responsible.”

　　“It’s being callous,” Carlisle corrected gently. “Every life is precious.”

　　Rosalie sighed heavily and her lower lip pouted out. Emmett patted her shoulder.

　　“It’ll be fine, Rose,” he encouraged in a low voice.

　　“The question,” Carlisle continued, “is whether we should move on?”

　　“No,” Rosalie moaned. “We just got settled. I don’t want to start on mysophomore year in high school again!”

　　“You could keep your present age, of course,” Carlisle said.

　　“And have to move again that much sooner?” she countered.

　　Carlisle shrugged.

　　“I like it here! There’s so little sun, we get to be almost normal.”

　　“Well, we certainly don’t have to decide now. We can wait and see if it becomesnecessary. Edward seems certain of the Swan girl’s silence.”

　　Rosalie snorted.

　　But I was no longer worried about Rose. I could see that she would go along withCarlisle’s decision, not matter how infuriated she was with me. Their conversation hadmoved on to unimportant details.

　　Jasper remained unmoved.

　　I understood why. Before he and Alice had met, he’d lived in a combat zone, arelentless theater of war. He knew the consequences of flouting the rules—he’d seen thegrisly aftermath with his own eyes.

　　It said much that he had not tried to calm Rosalie down with his extra faculties,nor did he now try to rile her up. He was holding himself aloof from this discussion—above it.

　　“Jasper,” I said.

　　He met my gaze, his face expressionless.

　　“She won’t pay for my mistake. I won’t allow that.”

　　 “She benefits from it, then? She should have died today, Edward. I would onlyset that right.”

　　I repeated myself, emphasizing each word. “I will not allow it.”

　　His eyebrows shot up. He wasn’t expecting this—he hadn’t imagined that I wouldact to stop him.

　　He shook his head once. “I won’t let Alice live in danger, even a slight danger.

　　You don’t feel about anyone the way I feel about her, Edward, and you haven’t livedthrough what I’ve lived through, whether you’ve seen my memories or not. You don’tunderstand.”

　　“I’m not disputing that, Jasper. But I’m telling you now, I won’t allow you tohurt Isabella Swan.”

　　We stared at each other—not glaring, but measuring the opposition. I felt himsample the mood around me, testing my determination.

　　“Jazz,” Alice said, interrupting us.

　　He held my gaze for a moment more, and then looked at her. “Don’t bothertelling me you can protect yourself, Alice. I already know that. I’ve still got to—”

　　“That’s not what I’m going say,” Alice interrupted. “I was going to ask you for afavor.”

　　I saw what was on her mind, and my mouth fell open with an audible gasp. Istared at her, shocked, only vaguely aware that everyone besides Alice and Jasper wasnow eyeing me warily.

　　“I know you love me. Thanks. But I would really appreciate it if you didn’t try tokill Bella. First of all, Edward’s serious and I don’t want you two fighting. Secondly,she’s my friend. At least, she’s going to be.”

　　It was clear as glass in her head: Alice, smiling, with her icy white arm around thegirl’s warm, fragile shoulders. And Bella was smiling, too, her arm around Alice’s waist.

　　The vision was rock solid; only the timing of it was unsure.

　　“But…Alice…” Jasper gasped. I couldn’t manage to turn my head to see hisexpression. I couldn’t tear myself away from the image in Alice’s head in order to hearhis.

　　 “I’m going to love her someday, Jazz. I’ll be very put out with you if you don’tlet her be.”

　　I was still locked into Alice’s thoughts. I saw the future shimmer as Jasper’sresolve floundered in the face of her unexpected request.

　　“Ah,” she sighed—his indecision had cleared a new future. “See? Bella’s notgoing to say anything. There’s nothing to worry about.”

　　The way she said the girl’s name…like they were already close confidants…“Alice,” I choked. “What…does this…?”

　　“I told you there was a change coming. I don’t know, Edward.” But she lockedher jaw, and I could see that there was more. She was trying not to think about it; shewas focusing very hard on Jasper suddenly, though he was too stunned to haveprogressed much in his decision making.

　　She did this sometimes when she was trying to keep something from me.

　　“What, Alice? What are you hiding?”

　　I heard Emmett grumble. He always got frustrated when Alice and I had thesekinds of conversations.

　　She shook her head, trying to not let me in.

　　“Is it about the girl?” I demanded. “Is it about Bella?”

　　She had her teeth gritted in concentration, but when I spoke Bella’s name, sheslipped. Her slip only lasted the tiniest portion of a second, but that was long enough.

　　“NO!” I shouted. I heard my chair hit the floor, and only then realized I was onmy feet.

　　“Edward!” Carlisle was on his feet, too, his arm on my shoulder. I was barelyaware of him.

　　“It’s solidifying,” Alice whispered. “Every minute you’re more decided.

　　There’re really only two ways left for her. It’s one or the other, Edward.”

　　I could see what she saw…but I could not accept it.

　　“No,” I said again; there was no volume to my denial. My legs felt hollow, and Ihad to brace myself against the table.

　　“Will somebody please let the rest of us in on the mystery?” Emmett complained.

　　“I have to leave,” I whispered to Alice, ignoring him.

　　 “Edward, we’ve already been over that,” Emmett said loudly. “That’s the bestway to start the girl talking. Besides, if you take off, we won’t know for sure if she’stalking or not. You have to stay and deal with this.”

　　“I don’t see you going anywhere, Edward,” Alice told me. “I don’t know if youcan leave anymore.” Think about it, she added silently. Think about leaving.

　　I saw what she meant. Yes, the idea of never seeing the girl again was…painful.

　　But it was also necessary. I couldn’t sanction either future I’d apparently condemned herto.

　　I’m not entirely sure of Jasper, Edward, Alice went on. If you leave, if he thinksshe’s a danger to us…“I don’t hear that,” I contradicted her, still only halfway aware of our audience.

　　Jasper was wavering. He would not do something that would hurt Alice.

　　Not right this moment. Will you risk her life, leave her undefended?

　　“Why are you doing this to me?” I groaned. My head fell into my hands.

　　I was not Bella’s protector. I could not be that. Wasn’t Alice’s divided futureenough proof of that?

　　I love her, too. Or I will. It’s not the same, but I want her around for that.

　　“Love her, too?” I whispered, incredulous.

　　She sighed. You are so blind, Edward. Can’t you see where you’re headed?

　　Can’t you see where you already are? It’s more inevitable than the sun rising in the east.

　　See what I see…I shook my head, horrified. “No.” I tried to shut out the visions she revealed tome. “I don’t have to follow that course. I’ll leave. I will change the future.”

　　“You can try,” she said, her voice skeptical.

　　“Oh, come on!” Emmett bellowed.

　　“Pay attention,” Rose hissed at him. “Alice sees him falling for a human! Howclassically Edward!” She made a gagging sound.

　　I scarcely heard her.

　　“What?” Emmett said, startled. Then his booming laugh echoed through theroom. “Is that what’s been going on?” He laughed again. “Tough break, Edward.”

　　 I felt his hand on my shoulder, and I shook it off absently. I couldn’t payattention to him.

　　“Fall for a human?” Esme repeated in a stunned voice. “For the girl he savedtoday? Fall in love with her?”

　　“What do you see, Alice? Exactly,” Jasper demanded.

　　She turned toward him; I continued to stare numbly at the side of her face.

　　“It all depends on whether he is strong enough or not. Either he’ll kill herhimself” —she turned to meet my gaze again, glaring— “which would really irritate me,Edward, not to mention what it would do to you—” she faced Jasper again, “or she’ll beone of us someday.”

　　Someone gasped; I didn’t look to see who.

　　“That’s not going to happen!” I was shouting again. “Either one!”

　　Alice didn’t seem to hear me. “It all depends,” she repeated. “He may be juststrong enough not to kill her—but it will be close. It will take an amazing amount ofcontrol,” she mused. “More even than Carlisle has. He may be just strong enough…The only thing he’s not strong enough to do is stay away from her. That’s a lost cause.”

　　I couldn’t find my voice. No one else seemed to be able to either. The room wasstill.

　　I stared at Alice, and everyone else stared at me. I could see my own horrifiedexpression from five different viewpoints.

　　After a long moment, Carlisle sighed.

　　“Well, this…complicates things.”

　　“I’ll say,” Emmett agreed. His voice was still close to laughter. Trust Emmett tofind the joke in the destruction of my life.

　　“I suppose the plans remain the same, though,” Carlisle said thoughtfully. “We’llstay, and watch. Obviously, no one will…hurt the girl.”

　　I stiffened.

　　“No,” Jasper said quietly. “I can agree to that. If Alice sees only two ways—”

　　“No!” My voice was not a shout or a growl or a cry of despair, but somecombination of the three. “No!”

　　 I had to leave, to be away from the noise of their thoughts—Rosalie’s self-righteous disgust, Emmett’s humor, Carlisle’s never ending patience…Worse: Alice’s confidence. Jasper’s confidence in that confidence.

　　Worst of all: Esme’s…joy.

　　I stalked out of the room. Esme touched my arm as I passed, but I didn’tacknowledge the gesture.

　　I was running before I was out of the house. I cleared the river in one bound, andraced into the forest. The rain was back again, falling so heavily that I was drenched in afew moments. I liked the thick sheet of water—it made a wall between me and the rest ofthe world. It closed me in, let me be alone.

　　I ran due east, over and through the mountains without breaking my straightcourse, until I could see the lights of Seattle on the other side of the sound. I stoppedbefore I touched the borders of human civilization.

　　Shut in by the rain, all alone, I finally made myself look at what I had done—atthe way I had mutilated the future.

　　First, the vision of Alice and the girl with their arms around each other—the trustand friendship was so obvious it shouted from the image. Bella’s wide chocolate eyeswere not bewildered in this vision, but still full of secrets—in this moment, they seemedto be happy secrets. She did not flinch away from Alice’s cold arm.

　　What did it mean? How much did she know? In that still-life moment from thefuture, what did she think of me?

　　Then the other image, so much the same, yet now colored by horror. Alice andBella, their arms still wrapped around each other in trusting friendship. But now therewas no difference between those arms—both were white, smooth as marble, hard as steel.

　　Bella’s wide eyes were no longer chocolate. The irises were a shocking, vivid crimson.

　　The secrets in them were unfathomable—acceptance or desolation? It was impossible totell. Her face was cold and immortal.

　　I shuddered. I could not suppress the questions, similar, but different: What did itmean—how had this come about? And what did she think of me now?

　　I could answer that last one. If I forced her into this empty half-life through myweakness and selfishness, surely she would hate me.

　　 But there was one more horrifying image—worse than any image I’d ever heldinside my head.

　　My own eyes, deep crimson with human blood, the eyes of the monster. Bella’sbroken body in my arms, ashy white, drained, lifeless. It was so concrete, so clear.

　　I couldn’t stand to see this. Could not bear it. I tried to banish it from my mind,tried to see something else, anything else. Tried to see again the expression on her livingface that had obstructed my view for the last chapter of my existence. All to no avail.

　　Alice’s bleak vision filled my head, and I writhed internally with the agony itcaused. Meanwhile, the monster in me was overflowing with glee, jubilant at thelikelihood of his success. It sickened me.

　　This could not be allowed. There had to be a way to circumvent the future. Iwould not let Alice’s visions direct me. I could choose a different path. There wasalways a choice.

　　There had to be.